Date Night? – Make it a Pleasure Party!
by Katie Throckmorton

Mike and Tamae have me on speakerphone. They confer with each other before answering my questions – she makes sure to ask his opinion before answering, and he’s quick to volunteer it. The more I talk with them, I’m actually kind of sad that they live in Oregon and I’m in the California – they sound like such an awesome couple!

And if I needed more proof, I’m interviewing them because they hosted a Pleasure Party with Scarlet Girl last year. That’s right, both of them. Together. Guys AND Gals.

So much of what’s great about Scarlet Girl and the products we carry is the intimacy encouraged between couples. So it only makes sense to involve the other half of the couple in the party. As a consultant, I feel as though I can reach more people and promote the core of Scarlet Girl – healthy and passionate sexuality – by getting the men to join in.

“I used to be a consultant with another pleasure party company,” Tamae says. “That’s how I got the idea.” She was disappointed to find that many companies have a policy of women only parties.

Scarlet Girl, however, doesn’t have this policy. Co-ed parties, while not the norm, can be done as long as all the guests are aware and okay with it. This wasn’t a problem for Tamae and Mike. Vicki, their consultant, noticed this immediately:

“I try to get a feel for the groups I work with first off, and these folks were super laid back and very tight knit.”

This, Vicki says, was key to the success of the show. Because the guests were all so relaxed around one another, the show seemed a natural course of events, not forced or done as a lark for entertainment’s sake.  Both the men and the women eased into it almost immediately.

“Mike’s friends ended up liking it the most,” Tamae told me.

As it turns out, a lot of the aspects of a Pleasure Party appealed more to the men than the women – the trivia games Vicki played, for example. It brought out the men’s competitive spirit, and they had fun with “knowing more than the girls” about the products and winning the prizes. And Vicki didn’t need to alter her presentation much in any way.

“Our line is geared towards couples, so a couples show isn’t that different from a traditional, all female show. Inclusive language – ‘partner’ instead of ‘boyfriend’ or ‘girlfriend’ was the most notable change.”

I’ve often had hostesses and guests joke with me that their husbands or boyfriends would be upset if they knew about the vibrators and other toys they were purchasing. But not Mike.

“He was mostly mad that he didn’t know about the stuff in the catalog for guys.” Tamae laughed. “He thought I was holding out on him!” The Senso Sleeves, Happy Rings, Mini-Magic One-Touch, all these things are great for guys – as gifts, or as a way to introduce toys into the bedroom -- something that the two of you can use together. “They’re additions to the sex life, not replacements,” Vicki points out.

In my work as a consultant, I’ve seen lots of best friends become even closer over the bonding experience of a Pleasure Party. Being open about such an intimate subject works as a natural catalyst to bonding folks. Both Tamae and Vicki recommended the experience to me, and I hope to take them up on the offer in the very near future.

“It really pushed my own boundaries, in a good way,” says Vicki.  “It made me realize I was stuck in a way of thinking that wasn’t necessarily correct – this can be done in a fun, productive and respectful way!”

“We’ve got lots of inside jokes now with our friends,” Tamae said.

And, according to Mike, “the comfort level with the different products now is nice – knowing what things are and what they do. It makes it easier to use them.”

Katie Throckmorton is a freelance author, and a regular contributor to Scarlet’s Letter and the archive of articles on scarletgirl.com. She has been a Scarlet Girl since May 2007, and is loving it more every day!  She finds the products fun and classy, and is excited to share them all with the women she knows and meets through Scarlet Girl.   Her favorite items – at the moment – are Jenna’s Velvet Jewels in pink, the Jack Rabbit Vibe (always a classic), and the Hot and Heavenly Massage Oils.

Katie is always booking shows in the San Jose, CA area, but is also willing to travel up the peninsula and to the East Bay, and even San Francisco if she is needed there.